Today- I Hate Nerds
Class is about to end, and instead of staring at the clock like all the other idiots in class, that seem to think it is there utmost responsibility to run out of the classroom to rush to their next class, I’m staring at her legs.
They’re caramel colored and not long or short just somewhere in between and my eyes drift up past her pink skirt to her long sleeve black lacy top. My eyes lingered for a second on her chest before looking at her face. She was another one not looking at the clock like me. She was writing on her notebook. Maybe a poem, a short story, a song, a suicide note, or a love letter. Anything really. She looked up, her dark brown hair moving with her as she looked out the window biting her lip. Her eyes looked so lost and caught up in her own thoughts and I thought she was absolutely beautiful.
Then the damn bell rang and all the stupid idiots rushing to the door. Who’s so eager to get to class anyways? Fucking nerds.
I get up swiftly and walk behind her, since she always headed to her locker after this class to get her books for the rest of the afternoon. My locker was a few down from hers and I would always stop here with her even though I didn’t need any books. I just needed her.
“Hey Valentine,” I said with my smile. She turned around smiled a knowing smile since she knew I was the only one that called her by her real name.
“Hey, there rock star,” Valentine said hitting my chest playfully. Her grey eyes were shined when she saw my face.
“God no. Don’t call me ‘rockstar’. I’m not even there yet.”
“I have called you rock star since last year and I always will,” she replied with a side smile and focused her eyes on me. It’s true. I was the first person she met. She was wandering hopelessly in the hallways when I was walking out of the bandroom and I saw her. I didn’t always think she was beautiful. I saw her as any other normal girl. Cute and what not, but then she opened her mouth and I saw something a little more different about her, but not much of a big difference. She had seen me holding my guitar case and:
“Oh, so you’re a rockstar?” she said asking me tilting her head to the side. I looked down at my guitar case and back up at her face.
“Uh, no actually my name is -”
“No, your name is rock star and that’s what I’m calling you from now on.” And with that note she said goodbye to me and left with my information not even knowing my name. Sure, eventually she found out what it was and she used it in class when the teacher was monitoring us, but any other time I was referred to as “Rockstar”. If i got lucky she would say I was her rock star. Those days were always nice.
“Suit yourself,” I replied snapping back to reality, “I was wondering if you could help me with that photography project this weekend? I’m so out of my element in that class.”
“Ah, yes. I’m sure you are. No one expects a wrestler -,” she looked at me and smirked, “or a rock star to be in that class.” I rolled my eyes and scrunched my nose at her.
“Yeah, I’m aware. But can you help me? Please?” I said bumping my hip with her. Then she looked at me, and I looked back, my eyes dropping down to her lips for a second before looking back at her. She sighed and nodded then:
“Hey, Valley you ready to go?” Don said holding out his hand. I looked up and saw him standing with his black hair and his jean jacket. Valentine looked over at him and the look on her face was different when she looked at me. Her eyes were sparked and mesmerized and his eyes were only filled with, some lust and some nothing. Instead of looking at her eyes he looked at her chest and then her face to show her a charming smile. She grabbed his hand and looked back at me and waved, mouthing the words “I’ll come over this weekend”.
Then her and Douche Don walked away as he talked about his next gig coming up at the local bar with his buddies and how awesome hes going to play his drums.
It’s always the damn drummers. and the douches. He’s the Douchey Drummer Don and I hate him.
Two Days Later- Bitches
So today my friend Dexter heard from his ex girlfriend, who heard from her best friend, who heard from her gay friend, who heard from his straight friend, that Don was gay.
He’s been cheating on Valentine with one of his bandmates for 3 months. Valentine and Don have been dating for 4 months.Practically since the school year started.
I am so fucking happy right now.
That means that if I know, then everyone knows. Not that I’m Mr.Popular but I’m on the wrestling team which makes me part of that group, ya know? So that means that the next time I see Valentine she should be broken up with Don and totally ready to fall into my arms. I made sure I smelt extra good today after hearing the news yesterday at practice when Dexter was telling me while we were wrestling. Yeah we looked gay since he was whispering the whole story into my ear and then I screamed out “YES” . But it‘s whatever we act like this all the time.
So I was sitting down in Photography class waiting for the bell to ring and no surprise the nerds were already in their seats. I was sitting casually with a “wow, I really don’t want to be here” look when I totally did so I could see Valentine and just make her fall in love with me.
But when I saw her It wasn’t what I expected.
Valentine walks into class with her grey eyes searching for mine and when she looks at me, its the same face she gives Don in the hallway when she sees him. I get up and walk over to her and suddenly we are in the room alone and she asks for my comfort as I hold her in my arms with a sigh. Right where she’s supposed to be and we kiss awesomely and she’s finally mine.
Valentine walks into class and everyone instantly starts to whisper, leaning over and talking to their neighbors about the break up.
Valentine wasn’t a cheerleader or super popular but she was different and friendly and everyone found her interesting. And she was a prize. She was shapey and flirty and had a killer smile that every guy wanted. And Don got her and he was gay.
Anyways, when I saw her she looked so unhappy. I’ve never seen her upset. Even on days when I noticed she was off and I asked her if she was okay, she would look me straight in the eyes and say “No, I’m not”, but continued to smile and walked away. Even when she was sad, she managed to keep her smile on and those were one of the things I absolutely loved about her. But the way she was now was like a different person. Her eyes were red and she kept her head down. Melancholy did not look good on her.
“Valley, are you okay?” her friend Mel asked her. Valentine looked over at her and nodded silently. Something a normal person would have done, which so isn’t Valentine. The bell rang, but our irresponsible and eccentric photography teacher was nowhere in sight and the class started to talk louder, mostly conversations about Don and Valentine breaking up. Then Heather, the main bitch in our grade talked louder purposely for poor Valentine to hear her:
“Wow, she’s such a bad companion that she made the hot Don go queer in one month of their relationship. Great, now she’s ruined the chances for all the other girls,” she said with a sneer on her face. she looked in the direction of Valentine who tried hard to keep her face composed her hands balling into a fist. Heather noticed it would take more than that to get a reaction out of her so she continued her tirade.
“Like I wonder if he got tired of her indie rock music, photography, and her skimpy lacy tops.” I saw a tear streak down Valentine’s face and she quickly wiped away so no one would see. She kept looking out the window like a bird looking out a cage waiting for sweet freedom.
“I wonder if maybe it’s because she was just so bad at sex that he just lost all hope in the female race and went gay.”
“Oh, shut the fuck up would you? Like damn, Heather. Just because Don broke up with you and dated Valentine the next year doesn’t give you the right to run her over with your white trash trucker mouth,” I said. That shut her up. She was ready to say something, but I simply held up my hand as a suggestion for her to talk to. I got up and walked over to Valentine’s desk and taking her hand and towards the door.
“What are you doing, Henry?” she asked me. I cringed when I heard her say my real name. She was really out of whack.
“We’re leaving,” I said bluntly. Valentine and I walked into the hallway but I walked back into the classroom and looked at Heather.
“By the way I heard Don said that you sucked at giving him head and that you really need to wax or something. Like everywhere,” I said letting my hands gesture to everywhere on my body as an example. “If you know what I mean. Later, bitch.”
And with that Valentine and I left the school.
6 Months Ago- When I fell in love with Valentine
Valentine and I were on a rooftop of an abandoned building in our town. We were on our backs looking at the sky even though there were no stars out there that night. It was cloudy and it looked ugly, but we didn’t care.
“So, why do you always call me Valentine? I told you to call me Valley and everyone else does besides you.”
“When will you stop calling me rockstar?” I asked looking away from the sky to her face which I then noticed was more beautiful than the scenery above me. I didn’t stop these thoughts that were coming up lately. I just let them come. She was beautiful and interesting and exciting. From the texts that lasted until the sun came up and phone calls that consisted of us talking for hours on end about how chocolate makes people happy ( with scientific fact to back up our arguments) and other good things. I went to her house and we sat in her room listening to her indie playlist of every song she has ever loved on loop and I loved absolutely every song which made her very happy. I met her family who adores me, not even bragging, and they too , like her, were not normal. But I think that is what I loved the most about them. I started spending more time with her and noticed how much I wanted to be with her more and more everyday.
“Fine, be that way.” She rolled on top of me just laying there looking at me in the face.
“Yes, is there something you need?” I asked casually with a small smile playing on my lips. On the inside I was telling myself to kiss her like holy shit this was not time to act smooth, but my brain decided against it. I felt my heart race pick up as I felt her chest push against mine and just the feeling of her body against me made me insane, but I kept my cool with my small smile. She picked herself up and went to the edge looking over. I felt the leave of absence over me when the wind made my body shiver, her warm body already missed. I looked at the sky a moment longer and then got up. I walked over to her and leaned, my back against the ledge. She looked down and then up at all the lights and the city in the distance.
“Do you think this is pretty? Be honest. A lot of guys would just say yes since it’s expected but do you genuinely find this sight to be beautiful?” I looked at her and then at the people below us and the city in the distance with the lights shining. They seemed to be so much brighter tonight in order to make up for the stars that were not able to show tonight because of the clouds. Then I looked at her and saw the reflection of the lights in her eyes. She looked at me waiting for an answer.
I just stated it simply. I come up here often to just look, but never wondered if it was pretty until now, but I have noticed that it is stunning.The wind picked up and her straight hair flowed as if it was always part of the air that was sweeping past, and the way that the lights reflected in her eyes perfectly was absolutely dazzling. Almost as if my city that I looked out to every once in a while to get away from things, to feel calm, to find a reason to be happy, to forget my reasons to be sad, to simply find the beauty in a simple thing, all reflected into her eyes and onto her face.
And in that moment she had become the reasons for those things. She was suddenly my escape, my reason to feel calm, to find a reason to be happy, to forget my reasons to be sad, to simply find the beauty in all things around me. In her.
So then I fell in love with Valentine.
Then I realized, wow I’m fucked.
Three Months Ago- My Motorcycle and Valentine
“Whoa, this is beautiful,” Valentine said, looking at my beauty.
I put a hand on my motorcycle, “Yeah, even prettier than you.” She hit me in the arm and mounted the bike.
“C’mon let’s get going.”
“Valentine, I don’t know what drugs you took this morning, but you can’t drive a motorcycle legally and well I can,” I said flashing my license in her face.
“Okay well take me for a ride then.”
“You’d have to sit in the back.”
“But I want to sit in the front.”
This argument continued and like most of the arguments she had gotten her way and she would sit in the front and me behind her. Luckily my arms were long enough to reach the handles so I could still reach them and steer while she held onto the handles too. We both got on.
“You sure Don would be okay with you riding on a motorcycle with the hot rock star on the wrestling team?” I asked her
She ruffled my blonde hair and whispered in my ear, “Who cares about Don right now? Let’s ride.” Damn she was so sexy. She has to stop or her and Don are going to have a lot of problems soon.
“Oh, no that sounds way too country for me.”
“That’s better.” And with that we put on the helmets and she put her hands on the handles and my hands went on top of hers our fingers filling in each other places as if we had become one. It was one of these moments that had given me hope. There is no way that two people can fit together so perfectly and not end up together one day. I wasn’t part of her clique or her bestest friend in the world, but we were close and we had our fun together. We were people. And we just happen to be meant for each other. So while we were riding as one on the highway I would think just how long it would take her to realize that.
Present- Ice cream, Tears, and Confessions
We had stayed at my house since my parents wouldn’t even be home until tomorrow and she fell asleep on my couch the moment we sat down. She woke up and I asked her if she wanted some ice cream since that’s what most girls want when they break up with a guy. She replied no since it was so cliche and so predictable that she refused to do such a thing. So then I asked if she wanted tacos and she said yes.
We went and got tacos and I stayed silent the whole time and I never mentioned Don. She asked me questions about wrestling which I know wasn’t her favorite interest, but she knew I liked talking about it so I did.
“Why do you call me Valentine instead of Valley?” she asked again. I sighed and decided I just might as well tell her.
“This is going to sound very feminine like but it makes me feel, special. I love your name and I love you so I call you that ‘cause I feel like I know the real you. I don’t know. It’s hard to explain.”
“Thanks rockstar. That’s all you had to say.”
We finished our tacos and then I took her to the abandoned building where we sat and looked out to the city again.
“I’m not mad that he’s gay. Everyone keeps asking me that question. That’s not my reason why.” I looked in her direction. She opened her mouth to continue talking and I sat on the ledge my feet swinging over the side of the building. She came and joined me and continued talking.
“I’m upset, heartbroken because he cheated on me. Like everything was a lie. The thing that really got me down most today was the comments being made about me. Not much Don.” I waited for her to say more but she didn’t.
“So you’re saying that you and Don breaking up isn’t even making you that much upset?” I asked. She looked at me and shrugged.
“It was dissolving anyways. Just going away, I don’t know.” She looked down unsure of herself.
“Is this the romantic moment where you tell me you can’t get me out of your head or something?” She asked me with an arched eyebrow. I just looked at her and hope she didn’t actually think that. Valentine so didn’t need to know my deep deep feelings for her yet.
I stuttered, “N-no,” then I manned up, “It doesn’t matter if I can get you outta my head. The thing is, is that I can’t get you out of my heart.” She looked up at me surprised and searched my eyes and looked back at the city. I put my hand over hers and curled my fingers around her long skinny ones. I looked at her lips that Don has probably kissed so many times and lips that I have dreamed of kissing over and over again.
“I want to kiss you.” I stated bluntly.
“I know.” I was taken back by her reply and my heart race pumped up. I was scared of rejection. If she rejected me I swear to God I’m going to jump off this building. (maybe).
“How are you so sure?” I snapped. I didn’t mean for it to but it just happened.
“You look at my lips a lot when you’re talking to me,” She looked at me now and we held eye to eye contact for like four seconds before I looked at her lips. I seriously have an issue. I closed my eyes and looked away but she put her hand on my cheek and turned it gently towards her again.
“So you never look at my lips or something?” I asked curiously keeping eye contact with her.
“Yes, only when you’re not looking though. Like in photography. I’m looking at you, curious.”
“Of kissing you.”
And then in front of the city, above the people below, Was me and my Valentine kissing each other finally. Her hair blowing in the wind, my pale skin touching her caramel skin, my lips on her, the winter wind blowing on us as if inviting us for a ride. I pulled away from her and looked into her eyes. No words had to be said. We both understood. I saw my city and my reasons and in my eyes she saw her reasons and her cities in my brown ones.
then I realized, we were in love with each other.
Maybe, I’m not fucked after all.
The Next Day- I’ve gone absolutely insane.
Sitting in Photography class was probably torture for me. It was Friday afternoon and everyone was staring at the clock except me. But I wasn’t looking at Valentine this time. I knew she was looking at me, looking at my lips. Maybe she was no longer curious, but still looking because she could. I felt her eyes on me and I smiled thinking “Finally it’s the other way around.” A boy next to me asked if I was crazy, smiling to myself for no apparent reason. I looked up and looked at my Valentine who was looking at me, blushing because she was caught.
“Yes, I’ve gone absolutely insane.”